Elda M. Lopez is the author of, THE (IN)FIDELITY FACTOR: Points to Ponder Before You Cheat, a Global Ebook Awards nominee, who got in touch with Westside Today recently to discuss her book, billed as a user-friendly resource on (in)fidelity in which Lopez provides readers with facts, surveys, and personal stories, including her own. Lopez declares that ‘cheating is defeating’ and thus provides solutions to fend off temptation before any damage to your relationship is done.
By Amy Sommer |
In light of Anthony Weiner’s rising head – again and Eliot Spitzer’s return to politics, it seemed a good time to join the media pack and discuss infidelity.
Since men’s emotional intelligence isn’t particularly nurtured by traditional society, which instead emphasizes their professional achievement and attainment of money and status, men tend to act out via cheating because it’s the quick fix. They have blocks when it comes to communicating effectively because they haven’t been taught to do so and possibly don’t recognize issues when they arise in a relationship.
On the other hand, women, although more emotionally intelligent and broad thinking (at least I believe so!), have been conditioned to acquiesce. The distractions of home, husband, children, and work allow women to repress their emotions which isn’t healthy or a pathway to communication; women will shut down emotionally and deny sex, men take this extremely personally and may act out, which in turn stresses the relationship further. With no resolution to the underlying unmet need nor communication about it and other issues, a woman may cheat. Granted, men and women have come along way to bridging these gaps, but it’s evident there’s more to be done.